From Mom:
To: Family
I saw this quote today from Mother Teresa:
"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotton that we belong to each other."
My wish: nobody's rolling their eyes and saying "what a bunch of crap."
Lesbihonest, Aunt Alice Was A Lesbian
From: JJ
To: The Fam
I thought I might see Aunt Alice on THIS list.
From: SJ
too lazy to open the link. is it top 10 lesbians or something?
From: Mom
okay. let's get the record straight. my beloved aunt alice (RIP) was NOT a lesbian. though there is nothing wrong with being a lesbian. though my aunt alice may have thought something would be wrong with being a lesbian. but she would be wrong.
i miss my aunt alice. she was such a nice heterosexual.
From: SJ
did you see her haircut, mom? lesbihonest, aunt alice was a lesbian. bless her lesbian soul.
From: Mom
no, aunt alice wasn't a lesbian.
by the way, i'm feeling very guilty now. this started when you three were young and used to say "that's so gay" and i would reply, "you KNOW, aunt alice is a lesbian. there's nothing wrong with being gay!" i made it up. out of the blue. she isn't alive and i'm feeling disrespectful now, both to my aunt and to the gay community. can we please move on?
brother, the more i talk about it, the more legs this thing gets...
Pro-Date, Pro-Occupy!
To: Dad
From: CJ
Read the articles below on dates. They should be an official staple of our shopping lists from now on!
To: CJ
From: Dad
I am pro-date (tho not eharmony.com), pro-fig, and pro-Occupy everything!
From: CJ
Read the articles below on dates. They should be an official staple of our shopping lists from now on!
To: CJ
From: Dad
I am pro-date (tho not eharmony.com), pro-fig, and pro-Occupy everything!
You Go Girl!
[In response to me winning a costume contest dressed as Amy Winehouse]:
To: Demi
From: Mom
Go girl. you saw it, believed it and you did it!
To: Demi
From: Mom
Go girl. you saw it, believed it and you did it!
Onesies For The Family
From: JJ
To: Family
Thoughts on THIS? i think we should buy matching pjs for the fam and wear them on christmas morning.
From: Dad
To: Family
Do they come in XXXXXL?
From: Mom
To: Family
I think it's a groovy idea. does everyone want this as their Chanukah gift?
To: Family
Thoughts on THIS? i think we should buy matching pjs for the fam and wear them on christmas morning.
From: Dad
To: Family
Do they come in XXXXXL?
From: Mom
To: Family
I think it's a groovy idea. does everyone want this as their Chanukah gift?
I Want To Know....
From: Mom
To: Megan
Who's the date with? Is it the perverted guy that you and E were checking out at home?Where are you going? Did the guy come to work on your loft bed - is he your date?...Is your roommate all moved in and where are you sleeping? How are things going with your roommate? Did you hang the mirror and do you have a room divider up yet?...I want to know...
Love ,
Yo Momma
vaporizers
To: Megan
Who's the date with? Is it the perverted guy that you and E were checking out at home?Where are you going? Did the guy come to work on your loft bed - is he your date?...Is your roommate all moved in and where are you sleeping? How are things going with your roommate? Did you hang the mirror and do you have a room divider up yet?...I want to know...
Love ,
Yo Momma
vaporizers
PERFUME ADVISORY
just wanted to send along another advisory about perfume. to reiterate:
THE PURPOSE OF WEARING PERFUME IS TO SMELL NICE.
THE PURPOSE OF WEARING PERFUME IS NOT TO DROWN OUT EVERY OTHER SURROUNDING SCENT (NOR TO COVER UP POOR PERSONAL HYGIENE ISSUES). AND ALSO IT SHOULDN'T CAUSE ANY OF THE PEOPLE WHO COME IN CONTACT WITH THE WEARER TO SUDDENLY FEEL EXTREME DIZZINESS OR THE ONSET OF A SEVERE HEADACHE.
love,
mom
buy volcano vaporizer
THE PURPOSE OF WEARING PERFUME IS TO SMELL NICE.
THE PURPOSE OF WEARING PERFUME IS NOT TO DROWN OUT EVERY OTHER SURROUNDING SCENT (NOR TO COVER UP POOR PERSONAL HYGIENE ISSUES). AND ALSO IT SHOULDN'T CAUSE ANY OF THE PEOPLE WHO COME IN CONTACT WITH THE WEARER TO SUDDENLY FEEL EXTREME DIZZINESS OR THE ONSET OF A SEVERE HEADACHE.
love,
mom
buy volcano vaporizer
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